So, how are you doing?
The question seems easy at first, but don’t be fooled. It’s actually absurdly complicated.
Because really, who actually knows how they’re doing?
I went for a hike today, and as I wandered along the trail (possibly imagining myself to be Katniss Everdeen), I asked myself how I was doing. How I honestly felt about myself as a person and my life in general. The only real time to ask yourself that question is when you’re alone – no distractions, no looming responsibilities – just you. Or in this case, just me and a forest.
The reason that question is so hard to answer, at least for me, is because how I am actually doing independently of anyone else is not something I often consider. I mean, think about social media. How often to you think you’re doing great, and then you see someone’s awesome facebook status and suddenly feel like you’re actually doing a pretty crappy job at this whole ‘life’ thing, after all? We’re interactive beings. We feed off of each other’s moods and ideas, and it can be incredibly hard, especially in the age of the over-share, to detach yourself enough to actually think about how YOU are.
Not how you are in the eyes of society. Not how you are in relation to the people around you. Not how you should be. How you actually are.
So, how am I? Well, as I wandered the woods enjoying the sunshine and hoping that my tragically pale Irish skin didn’t get burned, I realized that I’m actually pretty damn good. As it turns out, I like myself. And I like what I’m doing and where my life is going. Which is wonderful, but also difficult to remember. Because it is so easy to rate my life based on someone else’s. So easy that it actually took conscious effort for me to separate myself from everyone and everything and just look at how I think my life is going.
See what I mean? The question is not so simple.
The bottom line is that how great another person’s life does or doesn’t seem to be going shouldn’t have any affect on how you perceive your life to be going. Same with how society tells you you should feel about your life. Sometimes I find myself going out on dates and trying to meet people just because society would tell me that if I’m single, I should be trying to find a way to not be single anymore.
Looking at your life independently is so much more easily said than done, I know, but it’s definitely worth it. Otherwise you’ll just go around changing your perceptions of yourself based on the people who wander into your life at any given period in time. And then you wouldn’t be much of yourself, would you? Just a composite of everyone’s opinion of you.
So, how are you?
I hope you’re doing well.