The Magical Myth of “Hard to Get”

I have a blogging problem. Nothing for weeks, and then a bunch over a few days.

In this particular blog, I’m going to revisit a statement I made at some point last year – “Hard to get” does not exist. 

No really, I assure you, it doesn’t. The idea of being hard to get was created by society because we’re uncomfortable with rejection, and therefore have decided that someone being an ice cold bitch (or bastard) to us is actually a form of attraction.

It’s not. 

The HTG theory is the reason that books like “He’s Just Not That Into You” have to be written. Because for some absurd reason, women of the world believe that if a man does not call, does not express interest, and does not chat with them at parties, he’s playing hard to get. He’s obviously really interested after all and is just trying to act cool. Oh, that’s also why he treats you like shit. 

Following the delusion here? 

Now, no one ever wants to seem desperate, so there’s definitely a certain amount of “coolness” that you want to give off when you’ve just started seeing someone. Because you know, you want to look like you have friends and make plans and go do things and don’t just sit at home knitting mittens for your cat. 

But this all needs to stay within reason. If a woman rejects a man continually and consistently, he should not assume that she’s playing hard to get. HTG is why some men so insistently believe that no does not actually mean no. Ladies, it’s why you’ve got that one guy friend who is only your friend because he’s secretly in love with you and just knows that someday you’ll change your mind about him. Men, it’s why you’ve got the one girl still hanging around when you’ve politely rejected her at least six times and have finally decided to just pretend you don’t notice the fact that she’s memorized your entire wardrobe. 

We’re all just playing hard to get. Except when we’re not.

Which is most of the time. 

(p.s. If you’re actually sincerely playing hard to get … for the love of God, stop it now. You’re screwing things up for the rest of us)  


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